Sunday, March 13, 2011

Werewolf Killed with Fingernails!


Yes, you hate me for spoiling Red Riding Hood.  But now that you know that Catherine Hardwick's stinker has the lamest death of a werewolf ever, you will rightly divine that there are many other problems with the movie, and you will not waste your money and your expectations on it like I did.  Believe me, I just saved you from a greater hatred.

If you still must see it, wait for it to go to the cheap seats, Netflix instant viewing, or the cheap/previewed movies bin.  Great source material, nice sets and costumes, good actors, striking imagery, nice eye candy.  Too bad the plot is filled with holes you could pull a 747 through.  And maybe a tanker.  What a waste.

And to think people criticized Joe Johnston's The Wolfman (2010)!

8 comments:

  1. Didn't look like the kind of thing I'd really like to see anyway. I haven't been too impressed with the recent trend to 'reimage' fairy tales or classic old works for the modern age (Wicked, for example).

    Thanks for the warning on this one, though. My wife had expressed some interest, now I can warn her off.

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  2. Sure, Lord Gwydion!
    I really, really wanted to like it since I love fairy tales and classic movie monsters. When it ended, I was in a kind of a plot-induced stupor. Talking it out with my stepson brought me out of it, then I moved quickly into the "Anger" stage. :@

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  3. If you can't even make the trailer seem interesting there isn't much hope for the movie. Although any movie with Gary Oldman always perks my interest.

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  4. It's still not as bad as being stabbed in the back by a corn cob-wielding ailuranthrope. Oooo, the stupid -- it burnsssss! :)

    I had high hopes for it til I heard it was the Twilight director. Then I saw the trailer, and decided not to risk seeing it. Sorry you had to be the Ebert in the coal mine.

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  5. Sarah: That's quite a way of putting it! I look at it as a public service. Plus, even bad movies can give one ideas, and RRH did give me one idea.
    :)

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  6. A longer review for the curious: http://www.tor.com/blogs/2011/03/review-red-riding-hood

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  7. And, if it all just gets too ranty, go take a look at this Lockwood album cover and breathe deeply:
    http://www.tolo.biz/2010/04/23/spectrum-17/

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  8. Just as an aside, another movie you want to miss is 'Let Me In', a total cut-and-paste film based on the Sweedish version (which I reccommend much more-even though you have to deal with subtitles) And above the Sweedish movie version, the actual BOOK outshines both. The Sweedish movie changed the plot for the worse, and the American version, like I said, is a total cut-and-paste, no difference but the setting and language.

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